Why build and personalize a ‘Healthy Boundary’

In the physical world. It is easy to see and recognize  personal boundaries  as they come with a visible mark but in terms of mental health, boundaries are unseen realities.

These boundaries have to be part of us in a manner that they define us. It is crucial to note that boundaries define who I am and who I am not thus rendering a feeling of ownership of one’s thoughts and feelings.

The act of owning oneself is the foundation of building and personalizing a healthy boundary. If you accept ownership of your thoughts and feelings, the options available are vast compared to when you don’t own them and blame it on the situations and people who influence them.

Good In, Bad Out

To begin with taking ownership, just like a homeowner who decides to move into his own home, keep the concept of ‘Good In, Bad Out’ in mind. When situations and people who turn out to be a negative influence, you need to make sure to keep them out of your boundary while you let only the good influence you.

This doesn’t mean you build walls around people, it means being cautious to prevent any hurts from depriving you of your own personal joy and positivity.

Why build Boundaries

Boundaries are parameters that differentiate you from others. It is necessary to maintain them in a healthy manner. For instance, consider your skin, it acts as a boundary that protects you from the harmful germs in the environment. Similarly the words you speak can also act as boundaries preventing harm or bad from delimiting your selfhood.

You could also maintain the invisible boundary by removing yourself geographically from a hurtful situation that may harm you, or take some time off to relax and ponder; sometimes emotional distancing for the time being will heal an abusive relation with a motive to drive sense through  a pattern of change seen in the individual inflicting the abuse on their victim.

These methods are not meant to distance yourselves from others but it is a way of embracing yourself by being sure of your values and not letting anyone or anything distort those values, as they developed and nurtured you.

If in case you are unsure of your values or of the way to create boundaries, consult with a professional who can act as a guide to help you build your value thus strengthening your personal boundary.